I + HATE + YOU

Hard earn.

2012-01-28T08:43:00.003+08:00

Guess what? Im updating inside mrt!

Turned crazy last night, all my hard earn money gone just like this ! Have been not spending so much, just to make sure I've enough in my piggy bank before I open a new acct. yet now ? I've no idea who's the idiot, really. I don't know who I believe right now. I just felt so scary, you can even lost all your hard earn money in your own house ! Totally break down when I realize it, crying for hours. I just Wana knw who's the one. 'I really hope it's not you.

Hopefully Im feeling muchhhh better now. Controlling my emotional still..

Been busy for the past few months as usual. Wonder when will it end.

Attachment was good, it's all abt caring a stranger, after the care, you won't get to see them again. Trying not to be too close and feeling to those ah ma, ah gong. Just to avoid emotional problem though. oh well...

I really hope it's not you..

You;re the pulse in me.

2011-05-14T17:16:00.003+08:00

Once again, im back to feed my blog. Oh well , i had finally get into ite health science Nursing. The department head always came to my mind kept saying : You did not choose to get into nursing, but you got chosen into nursing. I like, i enjoy, im happy and excited everyday, land lastly, its stress and tired everyday too. about 2 more mths, im gonna asist the rel patient in bed, & this time round is not just by cleaning the eye, dropping eyedrop, checking th eye as usual. But their life is in your hand, you're gonna to use two hands to carry/taking care of them like infrant. Wish me good luck guys.

I did no went to school the past two days. Why? its student's fav, MC. Down with Pyrexia and flu. Was so weak that i cant even get up from my beddy, thanks god that i did manage to stand up and not POP down. My family and my love is real worried for me, love bring me to dr, making me to sleep like baby, tepid sponge for me to ensure my temp goes down, etc.. I know it had been a hard time for him, too. THANK YOU :D

Its saturday today, no more saturday night please, exam week is still in processing, managed to down my bio paper 1 and ns paper. What's next ? pharse test, paper 2, many many more to gooooooo.

SIGH...

Life is never easy as you think...

2011-01-25T00:31:00.005+08:00

Firstly, finally i had the time to login here...

It had been rather busy and stressing days this few months. But well, everyone knows, i will survive, i must survive and i can survive ! Because i always believe that after a blackie sky, there will be a rainbow up there real soon !

I had applied my ite full time nursing, what i can do now is to pray everyday, every single day that i can get in, in order for me not to contiue working in the clinic. Im happy working there, but if only just clinic asis and not those rubbish paper work, hospital invoice, etc.. I have nth much more to do, shall just wait till 26jan's resut release..

Sometimes, peoples always tend to think i can survive without someone.. But fact is, just sometimes, you can't. because without the someone, you coud just go jump down the building, OR, just get some advise from doctor from what's the 101 ways of die-ing . That's it.
Life is never easy as you think.

I really glad i had met my Mr Right. He gave me the power to carry on, without him... i could had just turn haywire. Just imgaine how powerful he is ?

Pray For The Best, Prepare For The Worst.

2011-01-10T00:36:00.002+08:00

Well, i bet this post nobodys really knows what im posting about. But well, who cares ?

Past 12. O lvl result is out. Though im not taking o lvl. But im registering my ite full time student. People might think, so? its just an ite nitec, what a big fuck of it ? For me, it another way round. Dumtyp had to be so stressed up because me, everythig is just because am too stupid to took up part time student. thhat's it.

Its nov, times flies.

2010-11-07T22:35:00.004+08:00

Its nov now, pass three month it was a rocky road for me. Thanks to my babes and handsomes around me, supporting me and make me move on. &yea, its over now. And ofcos, thanks to Mr Tay! Idiot, you know what? i never thought i will fall in love again, till the day i met you. No joke ! I thought i was dreaming when i first met you, i thought you are joking, i thought we will never meant to be. Few more hours will be our third weeks silly ! I know i had a habit that gave you cold shoulder, i'm sorry, please forgive me. I didn't mean it, i swear. Don't angry with me okay? Because i don't give you any reason to angry ;p

`Hold my hand tight, kiss me, under the million stars,

&it shall be forever, baby.

2010-08-30T00:17:00.001+08:00

; You without me, me without you, you contiue with your work work work, i contiue with my work work work, you talk to girls like only how you feel, i talk to guys like only how i feel, you kept thinking im a bitch, i kept thinking you're a jerk, you took photo with others girl, i took photo with others guy, you kept making me jealous without you knowing, i kept making you jealous because im jealous. You still live the way you are, i still live the way i am, you sleep like how you used to, i don't, because i still don't miss and don't love you like how we don't used to. If you still care, call me and say iloveyou. Even its 3am, i will reply iloveyou, too... [papaya pineapple apple and orange]

2010-08-24T23:54:00.001+08:00

Gosh.. i need a long break :((

2010-07-22T10:59:00.002+08:00

When you're sad, as when that's no way you can tell him how much you had fallen for him. You wish to get a boyf quickly to cover him. But the fact is, when a guy ask you to be his girlf, you automatically rejected him. Why ? Because you realize, your heart still wondering bout him. I never thought i would fall in love, then i met you...

Then, i realize im getting older...

2010-06-02T22:57:00.003+08:00

Okay, finally had finish my e-mail. ! Tmr, no more late morning. no matter how lazy pig i am, i have to wake up before 9am to do some work ! tmr will also be health sceening and BP extra pratical @ SMA, I just can't believe this coming sunday is practical test ! Please , i really hope i don't screw up everything. All i wish for is, finish the things in hand, pass what i should. do what i should and focus what i should. If i ever done all this. Im happy enough.

All parents don't ask for much from their kids, they just want them to study hard and get a good result. They don't aim their kids to get 100% perfect, even if their result just passed, its more than enough than anything else.

2010-05-25T23:32:00.004+08:00

Okay, i really feel llike giving up. its really very tiring, i never know adult life are so shit. I used to don't admit im stress, but this time round. I can't deny bout it anymore. Im afriad, i doesn't wanna gone to depression. By right, I always believe im strong, by left, am not at all. Though i know undergo all this, it will make me grow up and learn more thing. But its too much, really too much. Honest speaking, i don;t know should i say im regretting taking up Traininghip or should be a good thing that i can learn alot of stuff. I feel like ccrying out now, JUST WHO THE FUCK WILL UNDERSTAND THE FEELING IM SUFFERING NOW ?! DAMN GOD, I HATE YOU __

2010-05-24T22:56:00.002+08:00

WOHOO ! am here to make my blog alive again ;) Recently, quarrel with him . Yea, i don;t know should i trust him again. but well, i admit i still love him. For the another him. im sorry, sometimes things won't meant to be, there no point holding it. Yes, you are better than him, you can give me what he couldn't give. How i wish you were him. But the fact is, you is you, him is him. No matter how i face in diffrence point, things still won't change.

Am still hanging in the clinic, still dropping eyedrops to diffs patient. Nothing more to update, cos i admit that i have no life nowdaysssss.

` 我多么希望我可以假装你是他，但是我做不到。

2010-04-22T22:31:00.002+08:00

Today, i had lot of thinking. I remember i used to have no thinking of my future. People kept asking me what i want to be, and i replied, don't know, don't know, don't know. And i seriously can't bother to think of it. Well, when i sec4, things changed. I told myself, time to plan. I took one whole fucking night not to sleep, just to think of wht i want. And ofcourse, i wanna be nurse. BUT! in other to get nursing, i had to pass my science. &that's my most sicking shit subject whice i always get a U. i went to tell Mr seah whice is my science teacher and used to be my class form teacher that i want to be nurse after i Grad, becuse everybody had their interest, "Mun Zu Gan" For me, i felt diff when a patient walk away with smile and said thank you. And so, Mr seah helped my alot. Well, no point if others helped me and i don't help myself. So, believe it or not. I study damn hard on my science, and i got a C during my N's. Im not tryig to show off my result. I just wanna let those who are reading that, Dream Big. Because, "If you dream, you will achieve." "If you dream, you will success." "If you dream, nothing i impossible. "

Yes. This's few years, the road is gonna be very tough.Once i had choose it,, im prepared to face it. Though, i doesn't hv my boyf to be there supporting me, but i believe my family is still with me.

2010-04-11T21:22:00.002+08:00

I never thought you will worry/care.

It had been 12days without you, &im still hanging on. You asked me to call you once im awake. Well, i knew you will nag me about what had happened last night. Yes, i still miss you, but there's nothing i can do right now. I kept thinking of the photo i saw to make me hate you. Everyday when im walking the path way or taking mrt, its remind me of us chatting on phone every single day. When i gone quiet, you will sing for me, i miss you singing ;别在伤口上洒盐. Cos everytime you sang this, i will definitely laugh at you. I miss those tuesday you fetch me after my work. I miss the time when we seat under the star. I miss everything about you. Can't believe that i still want you. I kept telling myself, i will get over you soon. But still, I just love the way you tease me, even its fucked me up. No ones can be the way you ever tease me.

2010-04-05T00:46:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, things will never be the same again.
Just like now, me and you.

Happy Birthday, jiujiu ! Imy, its just seem to be like yesterday.

Its not because my face looks fierce. Its just that i never smile. If i smile, i will make sure your heart melt.

2010-04-02T23:30:00.001+08:00

God took him away from me, but he given me a other him.

2010-04-01T22:09:00.004+08:00

Why? i given you all my trust and you make me realize that i trust the wrong you.
I shouldn't have trust you so much. I shouldn't have being so serious. We plannned everything well. But yet, its all turn out to be bullshit. Just because i forget that i shouldn't treat you so well, i shouldn't have given you what you want, i shouldn't have thought of cooking and baking for you. Yes, i can't deny that i don't love you. But i can admit that i hate you, really hate you. the pain is just like, its hurt ever before, you know ? I still fet guilty of ended up all this, but after i saw that photo. Oh come on, i don't feel guity anymore. I kept telling myself, no matter what. baby; there's no way back.

最怕自己从今以后什么都不相信, 当初多勇敢爱了你,多勇敢才能原谅你.

我不要你的承诺不要你的永远
只要你真真切切爱我一遍

It hurts than ever before, you know ?

2010-04-01T01:12:00.002+08:00

Lex ! hahas, you must thanks me for this photo man! Cute isn't it ? (:

I believe what i saw, you're just uch a bastard i've ever seen.

F off from me.

2010-03-24T22:46:00.002+08:00

TMR! Yes, tmr im gonna be independence by myself ! &i believe i can.
Alright, everything's ok between us now. He called me this morning, surprisely im not the first to apologize. hoohoohooo(x
Seriously, i can't wait for sunday to comeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee !

If we paid $100 going in casino can smoke in air condition room. Then how about we pay $100 going pub smoking as well ?

2010-03-23T22:44:00.003+08:00

I wish, i could have that courage to tell you. I've never love you before.
But i failed to, because i have been loving you all this while.

Today, it's hurts so much that i couldn't control myself. I kept telling myself. A man who make you cried, he is not a good man. Yes, he's a bastard. This coming sunday, im gonna buy three diff types of fruits for him as his birthday present!

2010-03-18T21:15:00.002+08:00

Somehow, i just love the way you tease me even its make me feel so fucked up with you.

Tired .

2010-03-15T23:58:00.003+08:00

It just used to be so sweet, because i loved. It just used to be sour, because i cared. And now, f-ed up. because i had enoughed.

Sometimes, maybe im just thinking to much. I admit i got the thought of leaving. But well, surely we will get back together again. Now, i jut felt like, we are nothing right now. Baby. What am i suppose to do ? I just kept thinking of hving a lawer boyf

-.- !!

2010-03-07T21:24:00.002+08:00

What a great weekends i spent. Sat morning went have breakfast with him, then went to work. After work, went orchard with huifen. Buy this buy that, eat this and that. Today, i woke up early again. went "hiking with Huifen, Wanru, ashvin, qian huai and samuel. Reched west coat park, first thing is to go mac. I have no idea why i miss orange juice so much today.

After west coast went to Creative, but its close. so went back home. Reach home, bathed, sleep sleep leep. woke up, eat, pack those unwanted clothe. know what? I realize i spent too much money on clothe, wear less than 2 time then throw it aside :(

Well, well, its 9plus right now, im waiting 11.30 to watch ghost movie at channelu. :O

The best thing you can do, is to not do anything at all.

2010-02-09T22:47:00.004+08:00

I watch a malay movie, the very next day i tell him that little funny part of it. &He made me laugh whole day in just a word, Getting Older. .

You're getting older, and your dick is getting weaker.
LOL!

Days still goes on the same, wake up early in the morning, work work work all the way till night time. Valentine day;s is coming, same as CNY, i wanna make sushiiiiiiiiii.
Hoho(x
Well well, hardly see me cook, but i want to prove that im not a little princess at home waiting ppl to serve me. Though, after working reached home is kinda late. But i still stay up late to learn how to bake, cook. etc etc.Because i know someone prefer more home cooked food then outside food.

In life, there's always give and take. Just face it what god had given to you, and thanks the people around you.

2010-02-03T23:28:00.004+08:00

Oh dear, im really tired. But i promised to update before i went to my lalaland. Today im feeling damn shag that i actually cant be bother to dress up and make up to work, just don't imagine that i just wear a T-shirt and a jeans to work -.-!
Finally end work at 6.58, even its earlier by 2mins i also damn happy. LOL
Reach home nearly 8, bathed, eat and rush out again to meet ah fen to do some stuff. an hour ago, my mum told me something. &i felt its kinda true. I will never be stop busying until 9- 10pm everyday. Oh come on, im just 17 and i believed 17 is still young. And suppose not to be that busy. Sometimes, i really wish time could stop here, i doesn't want to grow up anymore. I want to slack, i want to sleep, i want to play, i want to hav a holiday. I need to fly to Hong Kong, but i just do not hav the time to :(

Given me nothing, but i felt something. ;becauseiloveyou,thatswhyileaveyou.

The best out of the rest.

2010-02-01T23:58:00.007+08:00

Dear blog,
Today in MRT, i realize alot of things.I suddenly feel like thanking god for giving me all my loved one. Especially, my daddy, mummy, my two brothers. My friends. Those bastard and bitchy out there. And of course my boyf. I never know that actually my dad care for me, im not trying to showing off of how good is my dad are. Its just that, i always thought he only care for his work. But once 2010, i felt the care from him. He always gave me the best out of the rest. He always make sure i've eaten my meals, if not he will always trick me to eat. No matter how sad i am, he will be there saying the other way round to make me feel better. Im lost of words, i regretted scolded him fuck you, even when he said, Its alright, don't do it again. Its just simply make me feel more guilty. He should have slap me, to make me feel better. &of cos for him, everytime when im feeling really really down that my tears almost drop down .He will sayang my head and said, its alright, everything is ok now. Yes, i loved to be pat and hug, who don't ? Though we always have misunderstanding, and im always the one who wanted to leave him and hurt him the most, but yet, he told me he nvr been angry and hate me at all. But still, its just make the feeling more strong and both of us are more into each other. Lastly, all my beloved friends, they always be there for me , no matter how bored i am, noi matter how sad i am, no matter how angry i am, their ears will always open and be there for me..
See, that's what i always said, if you're tired, take a break and think of your loves one. Bcause they will be the one who keep you going (:

Ignore this, im fine.

2010-01-31T23:09:00.003+08:00

Im angry, &im really angry... I'm angry at why didn't you tell me your bro's going today also? Yes, i once told you before, i miss your bro alot. What i mean by that is, i really miss him alot. But not as what you think. I did step myself into your shoe, it feel hurts. I know i sound hush in the afternoon, im sorry , alright. I don't care wheather you read this or not, i just wanna let you know, i miss your bro not by as what you're thinking, if i miss him like what you're thinking, i won't be be with till now.

angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry! -.-

2010-01-30T20:08:00.002+08:00

Its saturday today, &im late again./
In the afternoon, both of us is at suntec tower 2, but when he is at first floor, im at 2nd floor.Well, it's always wrong timing for us.
But...

After work, he waited for me at suntec tower two again .we thought of going Ikea walk walk after i knot off, but ended up his office something went wrong and he had to go back. So, he drop me at Gombak mrt, i went to meet liang liang. then... blablablabla :))

When one day i went quiet and walk away without saying goodbye,
Its means i really gave up on you./

2010-01-29T07:41:00.002+08:00

Had ben real busy nowadayys. Just imagine, sometime you doesn't even hav the time to sleep or touch your own phone smsing or calling your baby and darlings. Ytd is such a interesting day man, there is a guy who wanted to do OPP inside the clinic for his double eyelid. Me and jes thought we are prepared. But ended up, we always vomit and faint at the spot -.-
Wanna know more? Ask me then. (:

2010-01-20T22:48:00.002+08:00

I brought that colourful care bear for him;
& I bet he will like it.
Because he's my girlfriend.
LOL!

Take no shit from anybody.

2010-01-18T23:23:00.004+08:00

Am happy today, cos there is only one patient today.
LOL, Dr chuah came to me and said that the PPP i done is pretty good.
&i was like, come on. If you said not good, i will rather kill myself infront of you.
Is like, i spend don't know how many days, and spend 6hrs sitting infront the com doing it!
the worst is, when im sick.-.-
Oh well, hard work paid off, thanks god.
Dr chuah taught me something same again,
Take No Shit From Anybody.

Speechless

2010-01-15T22:26:00.003+08:00

Oh dear, my MC for two days is up. And i have to get back to work tmr !

Kissed.

That beautiful night

2010-01-12T23:56:00.003+08:00

Im feeling so guitly today. Seriously, i had never felt so guilty before in my whole life. i let Shikin waited for me in the clinic. Beacuse I forgot to bring the clinic key today with me, so instead of 7 leave the clinic. I took cab down to bedok to get key frm Jas jiejie. Then cab back to suntec city. leave clinic around 8plus. Im suppose to meet him at 7.30 to have some drink with his friends. Ended up, he waited me for 1hr plus. The worst is, he kena scan by two polices.

After that, we went to WCP. Then blablabla.
Reached home, mummy was like, where the hell did you go, why nvr switch on your phone. &yea, B was like, trying to called my handphone and house many times. Mummy asked me faster give her a call back. I'm sorry , i know i made you people's worried for me .

Because you're the one who always hold me close to you..
Hold me close to you again, tonight.
Will you?

2010-01-10T21:43:00.004+08:00

You know, i spend my sunday wisely. Seriously, i've nvr been spending my sunday so wisely before! COS' MON TO SAT I HAD TO SPEND MY DAY IN THAT CLINIC! Went out with mummy and korkor, went Bugis. Mummy brough me to pray pray, then ask bout blablabla. Somehow, its true. Im a trapped bird, &am really in the bad luck this year. Make me feel even fucked up that i have to wait till april or Aug to be normal. Just tell me, how am i suppose to survie this year? I wish, i could end this year faster./ i might turn crazying anytime. And im not kidding! _l_
Anyone ? I really need someone to hold my hand, walk thru this year.
I don't dare to say im stress. Cos i just don't dare to face it. Im taking everything slowly now, just hope that everything will end faster. People tend to say i had changed, but the fact is i never change at all. Am just too sick and tired of everything right now. Now, i fully understand why people tend to smoke and drink whenever they're feeling stress/fucked up.

e.v.o.l

2010-01-07T09:18:00.004+08:00

Yes, he always chat with others girls. &he's those guy that cannot stick with just one girl. Yea, ofcourse i hate him, im damn angry with him. We've been like, break patch, break patch. And then, i realize.. because i hate him, that's why i wanna be with him. These journey is hard, though.

My ex, called and text me saying that he miss me. &i replied: _l_ Go fuck your mother, cause i won't want to fuck with you.

I felt so fucked up, whenever i just woke up in the morning.

2010-01-01T23:12:00.001+08:00

My wish for this year is to, die within this year :)

IMY

2009-12-30T16:58:00.005+08:00

Hey yo! :)

I woke up early today, mummy called Him. He was like, "HUH?! Meet now ah?! Don't scare me leh!" I was like. lol. stupid -.- We are suppose to meet at 9.30, ended up He 8plus come up my house with his four piggy and his mother. How singaporean he is. LOL.
And so, he fetch us to Gong Min Shan to pray jiujiu, as today is jiujiu's one year anni.
Yea, it had been one year. After praying, went home do some housework, after that went to meet Baoting. Went carpark, blablabla.. Then go her house till 10plus. And so, went to take bus home. I waited the bus for like, 20mins?! Sit till my head grow mushroom. While waiting, there's free show to watch. two couple quarreling. Nice one. LOL

Somehow, i still feel that he just went over to my house ytd. Well, you know.. life's fragile and sometime life's a bitch. I just can't be more accurate to describe this feeling. It's a bitch such that you will never know what to expect the next moment and when you least expected, it hits you.

2009-12-29T01:26:00.006+08:00

Yes! I very angry, very very very angry with you.
If shopping is wasting money,then how about those tattoos on your body?
Mr Alex, you must answer for this! >;{

I need alot alot alot of courage now.

2009-12-27T23:01:00.008+08:00

Reached home about 8am, then blablabla, sleep till 1plus. Meet Ah liang at 3pm, then go have lunch before we headed to city hall. Went to suntec city mall to check out the clinic. &YES! TMR! interview interview! pray for me, guys :(
After knowing where's the clinic located, i saw SOMETHING! Yes baby! that thing i want! LOL, without thinking, i brought it (x
After buy buy buy, shop shop shop, went to meet Ken. kns, he bring us to some ulu place where there's alot of tiko. -,-
After thattttttttttttttttttt, pool till nearly 10 ;)

Somehow, i'm not that angry. But why do they always think that, i'll feel the way they think i'll ?

Do you still remember you have a mother with a cb? _l_

What am i suppose to do, when i miss you?

2009-12-26T00:05:00.008+08:00

Happy Birthday KENNETH LIEW!(: ;because you're once my♥
Happy birthday LEE KANG WEE! ; because you're my laopeh (:

I went to play pool last night, &i met a macho guy. Though he's 30plus. but he's still omg to me :DDD

I watched Delta campfire performace just now, &th smile's back on my face :)

Whenever i miss you, i have to bear through the night- /

2009-12-25T16:57:00.006+08:00

What a boring christmas i had this year. Oh well, atleast i don't spend my christmas on sleeping (:
Christmas eve, Went to work. He callled me, ask wanna go Boat quay after my work to drink with him and his friends. I rejected, cause if i does. It's gonna be very werid. After work, wanted to drink with Baoting. But she's tired after work cos she work full day.
So, i rental Phobia2 and Shorts at my work places. Omg la, so excitied can! finally that two movies i wanted to watch its out! :DD As for today, i went back to my work place. Return the shows then find Baoting talk cock in the shop.&yea, B, cheer up alright? everything will be alright ;)

Am not spending the night to party, but to crazy with that SI BASTARD! WOO~! :DDD

Damn

2009-12-23T20:29:00.001+08:00

Tomorrow! I've got to call for an interview appointment. I might turn crazy anytime now.

2009-12-22T17:11:00.004+08:00

I woke up early today, went to dover ite with liang liang to apply the traineeship course.I applied something that i can't believe with myself too! After sooo soo sooo longggg, i applied ISC Health Care( out-patient). And the worst is, its at the eye aesthetics clinic! wtf -.-
Nothing i can do now, but to wait after two days, call that DR chua for a interview appointment .

Im still feeling so tired that, i wish someone is here to pat and hug me to sleep. Will you?

2009-12-22T00:46:00.004+08:00

Im tired, i wanna sleep. Don't feel like talking right now. So, don't bother.

i must be hard hearted!

2009-12-16T23:50:00.001+08:00

OKay guys, that's what i drew my boss as :DD

2009-12-16T12:52:00.003+08:00

Byebye tattoo, because i promised someone not to have it. );
You happy jiu hao.

The fact is...
I miss walking to school alone with my earpierce on
I miss that old lady who always walk past me in the morning
I miss carrying the class diary
I miss looking at the name list.
I miss look at my name in th class list 31.Tan Lee Peng.
I miss walking around the classroom busy with admin work.
I miss having English lesson
I miss having math lesson.
I miss having science lesson.
I miss sleeping in the lesson.
I miss sms-ing in the lesson.
I miss playing with my 4yrs classmate.
I miss carrying shoe bags and full U to school.
I miss my 10 Sotongs.
I miss the sotong owners training us footdrill.
I miss kena torture.
I miss singing school songs
I miss... Disturbing the teachers.

Friday's getting N lvl result. Yes, i did said before. I won't cry for my result. No matter how sad i am. cause im the only to blame for not studying hard.

Now, i finally know who's my real friends.
&who are not.

2009-12-15T00:15:00.006+08:00

I DID HOUSEWORK TODAY!

I shall not dirty my blog (:

2009-12-14T02:09:00.004+08:00

I will never say, i love you forever.
I will never say, i will never leave you alone.
Because if i do so, i'm a big liar.

2009-12-11T13:49:00.005+08:00

Im still wondering, should i find Andy's for it :(
Should i?

2009-12-10T15:28:00.003+08:00

Im just back home from somewhere. And i'm feeling so suckies right now, when i realize i left 1more hour to work. Anyone? Anyone willing to feed me, so i doesn't have to work?

Even if i had your apple and orange, i will never throw you aside.
Cause, its not just only belong to me. But, OURS :)

Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.

2009-12-10T00:04:00.002+08:00

[ Onion head, imissyou. ]

im lazy to update photo (:

2009-12-09T13:18:00.003+08:00

Yes yes! Ytd went to have steamboat with xingliang and ken. Meet xingliang at my blk, on our way to mrt, saw chinguan. lols. thennnn. after meet up ken, we headed tobugis mumum ! never thought the three of us will be so crazy. HAHA! after we finished eating, the china lady came to us and asked: what ice-cream we want.. then i replied: Got what favour? She replied: Niu lian, mango, red bean. Then the three of us was like, huh? niu lian? then i go take a look at the menu.I was like, OH! DUrian? then the china lady said: ya, niu lian, niu lian. then the three of us keep laughing like fuck. LOL! After eating, went to bugis street walk walk, i brought one t-shirt and A-li baba short. While xingliang shop for his shoes ans pants.HAHA! lalala~ And so, home sweet home~

Today, wake up, bullshit. need to go work/. Im supoose to be slacking at home today, but ended up hav to go work at 5pm :O

2009-12-07T20:59:00.005+08:00

I can't wait till tmr to come!

Hoho(x

How am i gonna face you with my mum on 30dec? If there's a choice of not going, i will choose not to go.

If only hurting myself, will let you love me again. I'm willing.

2009-12-06T21:24:00.002+08:00

Alright, im back. And im glad that i still alive! I took off tmr, cos i really need to rest. Stupid cough started to begin. &I think i really need to see a doctor. By right, im suppose to bring my two little monkey to ZOO tmr. But its seem like, its impossible now. Oh well, My mood is pretty fine now, but i don't know why i just feel like saying one word. FUCK.
I just wanna sleep tmr. SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP! :D

A special post to TAN HUI FEN.

My baby bitch, im sorry to PHEW that metal thingy n hit your head. I never thought my aim-ing is so good :P

2009-12-04T11:07:00.003+08:00

Yea people, im feeling better after so many hours of sleep ytd. & i've got to go work later!Getting alittle bit of fucked up in work alrdy. Know what? i started to miss the time when i used to slack at void deck with my dears. But now? i doesn't have the time to meet them. Sometimes, i doesn't even have the time to sleep. By right, im suppose to thanks god for letting me fall sick, so i would have the time to rest. I always thought after N's i could have a nice break. Well, its seem like, im daydreaming again. Yea, like i always said. No matter how disappoint or sad you are, think of your dearest. Because they will be the one who keep you going (:

2009-12-03T00:17:00.002+08:00

Aw, kuku bird
A big sorry to samuel Tan ( soso)
He had a special post on his blog for me during my birthday.
yet ytd then i realize -,-
Here it is; a VRY BIG HAPPY B DAE to TLP
may ur wish come true
u stand by me all the time
u always bcox of me made so many scacrifices
u were there when i am not
u came and help me when i am in need
we have been true many things together even sometimes it dosent go the way we like it,
Thank you, ah boy :)

Don't give me any hope, please.

2009-12-02T23:51:00.005+08:00

He called me last night when im having meeting.Seriously, i don't know what you're thinking, if since you the one who choose to ignore me, then why can't you go far away? It had been half year, all this half year im doing stupid stuff. All this half year, i've been being so silly. I don't know why im stilling willing to be with you, when i knew we will never get married. When i knew we can't be together forever, when i knew there's nobody will support us. when i knew you're belong someone's else.Yea, it took me a big courgae to not answering your call. Please, i just wanna pretend nothing happen between us.

Panadol FLU MAX is useless -.-

When the trust, hope and love is not there, anymore.

2009-11-30T23:11:00.006+08:00

It had been so long since i last update my dear blog.
Was real busy during the holiday.
And there's so many thing had happen that i had really gave up.
For me, i seriously can't feel any friends down there for me right now.
I tried, i tried done everything. But i failed to do so.
You the one that i used to adore. But now, you are not longer the one.
You the one i always trust. But now, you are not longer the one.
&yea, no matter how i need someone. I know what the fuck am i doing.
All i need now is; peace.

Sometimes, when your tears drop. It's not because you are sad
But because you are tired in everything you do.

2009-11-20T11:53:00.001+08:00

Bring that spongbob boxer to camp ./

2009-11-18T21:31:00.003+08:00

Happy Birthday Nat Ha! :DD

Yea, happy birthday to myself too (:
Firstly, Thanks everyone in Basic NCO'09 for today, and the present!. Really apperciate alot :)
And also, those who wish me happybirthday :)) THANK YOU!

Mummy, i miss jiujiu alot. I really do, i can't tell you how i really feel. because i doesn't want your tears to drop again. I don't know who to go to, i just can't face the fact till now.

2009-11-06T13:08:00.002+08:00

Am so happy now, don't ask me why. Cause i don't even know what am i happy with.
ALright, had been almost everyday been working the past few days.
Sat and Sun went back HQ for Basic NCO.
So far, im feeling kinda great. Peace enough. HAHAHS!
Oh well, a special post to Uncle. " Thanks for ytd, just because you wanted me to cheer up. You admit you're uncle." :))

Keep telling yourself, just a few more to go!

2009-10-31T15:59:00.005+08:00

Yet, another disappointment again. It's always you and your words.

No, im not stress, really.

2009-10-30T19:01:00.004+08:00

Don't ask me why, i just wanted to let go everything and MIA for two weeks
But well, i know its impossible, cause there is just so many thing on my hand.
i can't throw it to others and run it away.
YES, i must face it! Nothing is impossible (:

At the state of difficulties, never say a N to a O.

2009-10-29T17:36:00.001+08:00

The most valuable thing in life is experience...

2009-10-28T15:17:00.003+08:00

Debbie, i know how you feel by losing something close to you.
Cheer up k? though is hard.
But what happened had alrdy happened,.
Your hamham doesn't want to see you emo.
they will prefer you to be that Ah siao :)

2009-10-23T10:37:00.002+08:00

I've decided to post now, cause i knew today after work i won't have the energy.
Yesterday zal zal and hakim came to my work place, and wait for me to end work. i was like O.O
then i ask zalzal, how come he's here. then he said because he did say he will come to my work place and wait for me. So sweet of him la, AHAHS!
Then after work me, zal zal and hakim went to BB intercharge to find huifen and junci. After that anwar join us, then we go mac discuss some stuff.
then then then, go home!

Today, i'm going back school for some uniform check, then go buy some stuff, thn go work.

Cheire, takecare ya? and have fun over there! :D

2009-10-21T23:57:00.003+08:00

A damn special post for *EIBBED!*

We live because of sex; so, cannot die so early okok?
But then, once after you sex, you can just go die.!
LOL! :DD

2009-10-21T22:56:00.003+08:00

Woke up early today, went back school train junior footdrill.
Well, atleast they improve alot!
if not, im gonna be so damn sad and disapointed.
Well well, after their training, rush back home. Sleep 1hour, then go work. Its 11plus now.
&good job, i just reached home not long ago.
AND! tmr morning shift -.-
Alright, i think i faster chop chop read my mails, and ZOOOOOOOM to lala land.
GoodNight (:

2009-10-20T10:49:00.003+08:00

Yea!
once i woke up early in the morning, ALVIN TAY WEI JIE msg me!
He call me aunite again -.-
Well Well, seriously, i love him just like his mummy love him can!
Nono, is i love him MORE than his mummy love him! HAHAHS!
He said he's going learn Motocycle later. And ask me to wish him luck.
Toot toot, i will pray for you inside my heart okay? :D
Promised once you pass, must give me a ride hor! i will wait for you (:
MUACKS!! LOL!!!!!

2009-10-19T23:29:00.001+08:00

Sore throat ):

2009-10-17T23:33:00.003+08:00

Had fun last night, i chat with Anwar and his cousin till 3am.
HAAHAHS!
Nice one man!
i die die must win anwar! (((x

I woke up 7.30am today, wash up blablabla...
went to meet junior to pass key.
Then go mac had my breakfast, i never know having breakfast alone's so relaxing and peace.
Anway, i went working today.
Kinda last mins news, what job? clean toilet. Cool isn't it? :DD

I get to know new friend, but i forgot her name -.-
Well, she's 20yrs old and she's alrdy married to a guy who is older than her by 12 to 13yrs old!
Sweet uh?! OMG! i want also!!!
She said: You might think abit werid, &i answer: NO! Not at all!
seriously remind me of something.
Oh well,
then nothing also. Just talk cock, laugh laugh, watch Korea movies. HAHAHS!

2009-10-15T19:03:00.002+08:00

Alright, im gonna be a cheerful girl from now onwards (though im already am) (:
Wahaha!
I ate kfc for my dinner, and drink green tea today, i don't care.
cannot tahan already.
Still, im willing to face the consequence.
Finally me, my little prince and princess got the time to get along together.
since i got the time, i help that two little pig bathed (:
&yea, happy time had past and moody time had arrived.
didi throw temper cos i force him finish homework before playing his childish card.
&guess what, dada suddenly
throw temper and cried
with some ants stuff -.-
SO, i kick their ass and shout, shut up and fuck off.
LOL!!!! :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Her smile, laughter, kisses, hug and tears. . .

2009-10-12T18:43:00.005+08:00

N's OFFICIALLY OVER!
Well, today D&T paper i nearly fall asleep.
The paper i hav confidence that i can get atleast 7 marks! -.-
I won't cry for the result, cause i only can blame myself for not studying hard.

If we can start anew, it will be tonight./

2009-10-12T08:42:00.003+08:00

Forget the past and focus on the future.
Stop obsessing on what you have lost and get what you need now.

Finding a right tattoo for a right place../

2009-10-08T16:51:00.006+08:00

YESYESYES! finally math's over.
tmr doesn't have to go school, monday last paper whice is D&T.
THEN! N's OFFICALLY OVER!
:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Once again, whitetiger, xiexie ni (;

No worries. Once after N's i will take a break in everything.

2009-10-06T20:03:00.003+08:00

Just once after she fucked with him, she realize that she don't love him at all.

I believed in my six sence;
Cause it's always the true . /

2009-10-05T18:43:00.005+08:00

Tmr math, WOSHH!
Pray for me, guyssssssssssssssssss.

Lastly, xiexie ni; Garbage dump papa ♥

2009-10-01T19:55:00.003+08:00

Ho Xing Liang, you diedie better like that present! If not i kill you! :D

Never update for last few days.
Cos i promise Whitetiger to study hard!
Yes, XIEXIE NI!
i hope teaching me, you won't vomit blood xP

THANK YOU DEBBIE TAN SHUN HAN!

Okay. im trying real hard to study.
But today due to some reason, i couldn't forcus much just like ytd i did.
Oh well, i doesn't wanna say much.
Straight to th point.
Its really a damn tiring stuff...

Mummy, i fallen for a guy that i shouldn't have..

2009-09-26T00:50:00.002+08:00

I promised myself to update about today during F1 no matter how tired i am.
Well, it's alrdy reaching 1am.
Reach home less than an hour ago, whole bodyache.
First day of the F1 duty, don't really go smoothly.
we wasted 2 hr plus WAIT TO RUSH, RUSH TO WAIT.
Due to some funny funny reason.
But still, ended up hav fun selling those Earplug and Poncho.
((:

Cause, i, am, a, superwoman.

2009-09-24T22:09:00.003+08:00

What if my husband did the same thing...

2009-09-23T17:10:00.001+08:00

恨.

Just keep saying me mean; i enjoyed (:

2009-09-22T18:13:00.003+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEOW MEOW! WOAINI ((:

Firstly, Thanks for WHOEVER visting my blog
This is my blog, i write whatever i like.
i can even write, i love my mummy, daddy.
i fuck my duck, chicken, cow, pig today.
It's also none of you f business.
So, let me make this clean alright?
You should know who you are, i doesn't hav to mention out who.
Just say whatever you like about me.
For your info,
IF I'M A BITCHY, YOU'RE ALSO ONCE A BITCHY, YOUR DAUGHTER too (:
So, next time rmb THINK before you say ya?
BEhave like your actual age.
Since being good, also no use.
from now onwards, i will be what you expect me to be.
Must be
happy because last time of me is back again (:

Alright, what a interesting day's today.
I went to school normally, keep begging them to forgive and forget.
YES! within one night, i've decided to forgive and forget./
so, i kept beg beg beg.
Ended up?
Then hav CPA paper, and math.
i did manged to do, better than not doing any qus.
After school, went to cherie's house.
i seat at the stair there, cos i knew im gonna kena blame again even when i know nothing.
thn thn thn, endedup huifen join me also.
LOL! Funnyone.
AFter the WHOLE thing, went to my blk slack.
Suddenly there's fews girls and guy came to us
said, faster chao, police coming scan.
then others three pig chao chao chao.
i was like. ?!?!
PS me -.-

By right, im trying very hard; But by left, i did nothing at all.

2009-09-21T20:29:00.004+08:00

Everyone's studying now.
Yet, im doing nothing.
i tried, i tried everything to make myself forcus,
but its still useless, i stayed at home the whole day today.
praying hard
that i could study for my mock paper tmr.
But there's nothing go into my head.
I really need alot of encouragement and support.
Thanks Uncle Daniel (:

Ain't gonna trust anyone; anymore

2009-09-20T20:59:00.009+08:00

just because you're afraid, don't dare to speak out.
is really unfair to us, you know?
why are you so selfish?
Why?
whenever you're in a deep shit.
who' helped you and clean your butt? ;i seriously never met a person who so selfish before.
if your Mother think that she's rich.
sue me then, i wait.
she doesn't have to be a bullet gun keep shooting here and there.
im scared.

Alright, though my bro's 22 yrs old.
he did hav his own childish part.

You just cared about yourself; you doesn't dare to face it, but to hide it.

2009-09-18T20:32:00.005+08:00

Officially Pass Out from sjab.
Yup, its had been 4yrs..
St.john had seriously made me learn alot alot alot of things.
if i nvr join SJAB, i won't be getting what i had around me now.
Especially, my other night sotongs'06.
i'm really grateful to god, for letting me met you guys.
Without you guys, our committee won't be able to do well.
Sometimes, i really do hav the thoughts whether did i did a good job for my post of DM.
Well. but i've told myself, no matter what's the result whether we did well or bad in our post. that's doesn't matter, what matter is, we did every of our part.
we did our part to pass down what we've learned.

SOTONGS; Thanks guys (:

SOTONG OWNERS; Thanks for training us, if not we won't be standing there like a strong SOTONGS! :D

Sec1s to 3s: Goodluck for your footdrill com! JIAYOU!

There's always unforgotten stuff, that i will nvr forget...

2009-09-17T23:29:00.005+08:00

I seriously hate the way you joke,
those words came out from your mouth is seriously so hurting.
If you doesn't like me to say Bangla's my laogong,
or even doesn't like me to talk about other boys.
You should have let me know..
I thought you could take my joke, cause you never ever tell me what's inside your mind.
If since you don't, then why don't you tell me?

2009-09-16T22:21:00.002+08:00

I really hav to buck up on my studies;

I must not wasting my time outside with loves anymore.

Sometimes, yours joke really hurt me...

2009-09-14T21:32:00.001+08:00

Alright, today's seriously not my day..
i doesn't hav any mood to do anything.
Gosh, tmr gonna hav CPA paper.
Yet, nothing is inside my mind.
Pray for me guys )x

` You said that three little words to me...

2009-09-12T22:06:00.003+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAIRUL!

YESYESYES!,

it had been 7 years, baby.

&now you're 7yrs old! :D

Went to East Coast Park celebrating Hairul birthday.

2009-09-10T20:47:00.002+08:00

You can say me mean, meanie, stubborn or even i've changed to another person.
i don't give a fuck on it, alright?
i've changed its all thanks to you, you make me doesn't want trust you anymore.
you make me doesn't want to believe you anymore.
you've changed, to me.
changed to a person that i doesn't want to know.
a person that im afraid of...

2009-09-09T14:18:00.002+08:00

Today's having N's English written paper.
Over all, its still okay. I never felt any stress when doing it!
Great isn't it?
AFter paper went to order cake for this saturday.
YES! its Prince birthday!
so excited even its not my birthday. -.-
Oh well, i reached home 1Pm today.
Mummy was so shock when she saw me,
she was like, am i dreaming? you come back so early?
i was like, IM A GOOD GIRL! :D

&yea, tmr no school.
Feeling great right now, cause doesn't hav to go school.
even for just 2 freaking days, its more than enough!
:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

You said:

you wanna be more important than bangla in my heart;

but yet, i lost my words to answer you.

I'm sorry...

2009-09-07T21:16:00.003+08:00

Love fades because people let it. There is no excuse. It's never a reason or explaination for it too. They take it for granted believing that it will always be there. But the fact is, it will never happen...

Why is tears salty?
Perhaps for one to remember the occasion that resulted in the tears:
making it a priceless moment in life.

2009-09-06T19:32:00.004+08:00

Woke up early today, cause i got to reach singapore flyer

for kinda a "meeting" about the F1.

Me and ma'ma Jac was kena cheated to go there !

At first, i was like. why meeting also need go singapore flyer.

then when we reach there, we finally know why.

Cause we need to walk here and there

&yea, I'm wearing heel, hello?!!

After the "meeting", went to eat.

thn me, huifen and xing liang's waiting for ken yap.

after that went to bugis.

im feeling so bad, cause i promised mummy not to buy any clothes.

Yet, my stupid eyes keep aiming one shirt,

ended up? huifen brought for me.

THANKS BUTT! (:

But ya.. im still feeling kinda bad.

Wanted to go for the Army open House.

but due to the way we wear and our tiredness, so we didn't go.

felt kinda disppointed, but. nvm.

Alvin korkor promised to go with me nxt yr :D

2009-09-03T14:05:00.006+08:00

Yea, today whole day english paper, english paper, english paper.
Is like, WOW?
Suprising, i really did every paper.
i never talk cock today,
i never play today,
i never turn crazy today.
Sorry BUTT and SEXY,
i never talk much today, due to because of i wanted to do well in my N's.
Was feeling kinda sukies when i realise that today whole day English paper.
because i still think that, i wanted to improve my math and sci than Chinese and english.
But what to do? i still force myself to hold up the pen,
and keep reminding myself; TANLEEPENG! its time to study!

I just don't know what for i still choose be with you;
when i knew there's no way you ever marry me.
I really wish you would say once,
iloveyou;
but i know it will never ever happen..

Cause i know i will never be the first in your heart -/

2009-09-02T21:30:00.004+08:00

Today whole day MOCK EXAM, MOCK EXAM, MOCK EXAM!
cool uh?
kinda slack and and shocking .
today's during chinese mock paper was so funny.
TanJianWei was like, playing pokemon on his handphone? -.-

I must be crazy to call you baby again...

2009-09-01T14:31:00.002+08:00

Why must be raining today!
WHY WHY WHY!
why can't be other day...

2009-08-31T21:55:00.007+08:00

HAPPY TEACHER'S DAY!

From the picture, you can see that i went back my pri sch this yr!reached there was sill early, so went to carteen.

we went to the carteen to eat.

Yea, the food we used to eat when we're still primary school.

After that, went to settle something.

All of them is seriously so bad!

i told them, im scare.

Yet, nobody believe me! )x

why are you guys so like that like that want?

Alright, i doesn't want to say bout that.

For those who's with me in the afternoon;

what a great time we had today!

2009-08-30T20:35:00.004+08:00

Maybe, giving up both will be better.

i don't know, i just feel that.
i really do need a break.

Your answer, it's doesn't matter for me anymore...

2009-08-29T22:05:00.003+08:00

Why are you like that?

why?

Okay, i seriously hav no idea why am i posting right now again.

Things had been changing around me.

changed, changed, changed...

Just like. 360 turned.

just one fucking night, and everything had been changed.

those people around me, those thing around me.

Maybe someone's right, time change people is the thing that we can't stop it.

So, you changed, he changed, she changed.

Well, maybe tmr you will see my right hand all over with tattoos.

who know ?

2009-08-29T16:01:00.002+08:00

Recently, things are getting better between me and my mum.
&yea, im so happy that someone admit im a super uber good girl!
Well, nothing much actually.
i just recahed home an hour ago, went to pray Ah gong, Ah ma and Jiujiu.
Last time, is jiujiu go pray with us.
And now, is we go pray jiujiu.
kinda sad for me to think of that.
Time flies really fast, now then i realised that jiujiu left for nearly one yr after few more months.
after praying, i saw Dinie at coffee shop.
he OII me very LOUD!
was so shock that he still rmb me.

2009-08-26T09:49:00.012+08:00

I didn't go school today.
Aiyaya.
not pon sch okay.
don't say till i so naughty, cos im not! (:
im a prefectly good, nice and kind girl!
So. don't jealous!
Well Well, im still wondering tmr should i go school not.
)x

God, you're the one i always love ;

Tell me what should i do now...